Christmas decorating. I used to love it. Granted, as a child, it was wonderful to come home from school and see the house bedazzled in red and white with a beautifully decorated tree in the front window. As an adult, I always enjoyed my own holiday decorating. I inherited my uncles Christmas village, and took pride displaying it for all to see. I always invited friends/family over to walk through my neighborhood to see the Christmas displays and lights. I had my own traditions and they made me happy.
The past few years, I’ve struggled with decorating and have cut way back. I stopped putting up my Christmas Tree and inside decorations, but still lit up the outside of my home to be festive (and to keep up with my fellow Grizwolds in the neighborhood). This year, I decided to go big. Decorating inside and out. I had a plan. Thirty minutes a day of all out decorating even on a work day. I could handle that! Right??!!
Well, I was wrong…..I couldn’t handle it. After about a week of following my plan, dragging boxes out of the basement and garage, standing out in the cold stringing lights, and I’m down for the count. My hands swelled so much they began to bruise . Pain extended from my fingers to my shoulders. My ankles to my hips….and of course, my lower back didn’t want to be left out.
Two weeks later, and I’m still flaring. I’m on a low dose of prednisone until my next biologic injection. It seems my body has to get used to taking a biologic drug on a monthly basis. The 5 week loading dose of the medication made me feel so good, I thought I was Wonder Woman!! Apparently, I’m not. Now I need to see if my body can bounce back. I need to see if this new biologic drug can control my disease. I need to see something positive to stay on this course. It’s scary, but I live in the chronic illness world. I have so many friends who are having much more difficult times with their health. I know in many ways that I am lucky and things could always be so much worse and I refuse to let my diseases drag me down any lower. So I am going to focus on the fact that my house is decorated and twinkly.
My shopping is done. My tree is up and my kittens haven’t knocked it over yet (I’d cross my fingers if I could 😂).
I may hurt too much to be joyful, but I’m not going down with out a fight. I’ll muster up some happy and keep focusing on a better tomorrow.